Wife and Mother: God’s Two Pillars in a Man’s Life

Wife and Mother: God’s Two Pillars in a Man’s Life

The statement that “no wife can love a man more than his mother” contains elements of truth when viewed biologically and culturally, but it risks oversimplifying the deep, God-ordained roles of both wife and mother.

Historically and biologically, a mother’s bond with her child begins in the womb through the umbilical cord, as nature hardwires a mother for nurturing. Across cultures, mothers are exalted: the Yoruba say “Iya ni wura” (Mother is gold), and the Igbo affirm “Nneka” (Mother is supreme). In Scripture, the tender care of a mother is compared to God’s comfort: “As one whom his mother comforts, so will I comfort you” (Isaiah 66:13).

However, the Bible also teaches that marriage creates a new, sacred bond: “For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh” (Ephesians 5:31). This union is not a mere association, it is covenantal. While a mother’s love is unconditional and instinctive, a wife’s love is covenant-driven, requiring daily choice, sacrifice, and partnership.

The claim that a wife would always choose her children over her husband ignores historical accounts of women who have risked, and even given, their lives for their spouses. For example, during wartime and persecution, countless wives have shielded husbands from danger at great personal cost. Even in Scripture, Abigail (1 Samuel 25) risked her safety to intercede for her husband Nabal.

Organ donation as a measure of love is also incomplete. Health compatibility, medical advice, and circumstances affect such decisions, not merely affection. Many wives have donated kidneys, livers, and even bone marrow to their husbands.

The right perspective is this: A mother is irreplaceable, a divine channel through which life begins. A wife, however, is God’s appointed life partner, meant to “do him good, and not harm, all the days of her life” (Proverbs 31:12). Honouring one does not require diminishing the other. The wise man appreciates his mother’s sacrifices while cherishing his wife’s devotion. Both are gifts from God, serving different but equally vital purposes in his journey.

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